became: ( ĸιѕѕιngcrιмe | lj ) (❝i just have a lot of feelings.❞)
neal caffrey, magnificent hipster douchebag ([personal profile] became) wrote in [community profile] ataraxionlogs 2013-03-19 09:50 am (UTC)

I tried, at least. You have to know that, Peter.

[ because somewhere in there making peter happy-- living up to his expectations-- became important to neal, more than he thought anyone's want but his own ever would be. ]

Spock says it's-- that whatever Himself did to me, out there? I can't process it. [ he taps the side of his head, sighs. ] Limited capacity of the human brain, something like that. When I first wandered back in there was hypothermia to deal with, starvation... I was raving, but they didn't think much of it.

[ he swallows, hard. ] I did it again, later. After I was fine. And I had no idea it was me-- thought it was a prank, someone screwing with my reputation for messing around on the network.

[ he looks down at his hands, flexes the fingers. ] Spock said no. And I draw things, Peter, things I don't remember putting down on paper. It's like I'm... me, and then I'm just gone. I don't know where I go.

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