hammertime

[fullmoon]

CHARACTERS: Derek Hale, Kate Bishop, Remus Lupin, Sirius Black
LOCATION: 9th Floor
WARNINGS: Alcohol.
SUMMARY: Just one more stop on the Bad Decision Express.
NOTES: I'm sorry.

[ A lot of careful planning has gone into this, as well as several lies, but there isn't much to show for it: just one werewolf waiting for another in the ninth floor bar, as promised. He's even really drinking alone. It's very quiet. Nothing to worry about at all, except the fact that he's already fired off a text to Sirius (he's coming & i have had two (2) scotches please hurry). Now his comm is face-down on the bar top, so once Derek joins him he won't be able to see any replies that might frighten him off. ]

I'm meant to ask, [ he says when Derek walks in, turning on the stool to face him, ] how you make your muscles look like that, and if it involves needles, and if you would be able to pick me up.

[ Two (2) scotches. That wouldn't be very many for someone with his metabolism, but it's balanced out by the fact that he's pretty scrawny for his height, which is also relevant to that last inquiry. How many werewolves can you bench press, Derek?

Remus smiles. He has never been more innocent than he is in this moment. ]

Sirius wants to know.

Comments

i cannot believe this is happening.

[altercate]

[ derek actually pauses mid-step, like he's thinking better of this entire affair. remus saving grace is the fact that derek's gotten more ridiculous questions in his lifetime from stiles and scott combined, and his learned reaction is a put-upon sigh. most of his skepticism is saved for the offered glass, which derek takes but doesn't lift to drink immediately. ]

Tell Sirius to ask me himself.

[ though the idea that derek cheats to get his muscles ( apart from the cheating that comes with werewolfery in and of itself ) is an affront, which is why derek tacks on-- ]

It doesn't involve needles. Why would I lift you up?

[ that's a deliberate word choice, because it's best not to put anything past sirius black . ]

believe it buddy.

[fullmoon]

[ Maybe Remus will tell Sirius to ask Derek himself. Maybe sooner than Derek thinks. ]

I don't know. Perhaps if I'm very drunk. [ He lifts his mostly-empty glass an inch to illustrate. ] Or to prove you can. That's always good reason.

[ Not really always—not seriously—but, you know. Gryffindor. He moves to take another drink, then stops and gestures to Derek's. ]

You're supposed to drink that. Otherwise I'm still drinking alone, only with an audience.

laughs into hands

[altercate]

I know I can. I don't need to prove anything.

[ though a more accurate statement there would be, i could. nowadays, derek isn't really packing the same level of strength. his expression tightens as he processes that thought, shakes his head rather than elaborate. ]

I'm going to drink it. [ though derek's mostly been caught out, he wasn't intending to take that first sip until prompted. ] I don't see the appeal in drinking with company.

[ or drinking full stop, but. ]

B]

[fullmoon]

[ Remus smiles and raises his eyebrows, asymmetrically. ]

Good. That means you don't have an excuse to leave me behind later.

[ Not that Remus is really planning to drink so much that he needs to be carried anywhere. He hasn't done that since 1977. Or—1982, maybe, but it doesn't count when you do it alone in your flat. It gets marked down in an entirely separate column of pathetic. No double-counting. ]

People worry about you less. [ He downs half of what's left in his glass and wrinkles his nose at the taste. ] If people ask why I'm hungover and I say I was drinking alone, they'll ask if I'm all right. If I say I was with you, they'll ask what you're like when you're plastered.

[ And this is technically not a lie, for what it's worth— ]

I wouldn't tell.

[ —which is nothing, it's worth nothing, the two people he'd be most likely to gossip to will be here in person any minute now. ]

pushes that face away

[altercate]

[ someday the time disparity between them is going to trip derek up spectacularly. remus is technically how much older than him again? but at the moment derek's pretty well preoccupied with the burn of alcohol, nose wrinkling at the taste. ]

I wouldn't need an excuse.

[ lies, really. derek's all bark and no bite. he always was, even in the beginning, when he'd first turned up in beacon hills. but after a moment he sets down his empty cup, shakes his head hard, like a dog trying to get water out of its ears. ]

Remus, I'm not getting plastered. [ since clearly saying that over and over will make it true. ] That's not why I came out here with you.

puts some other faces in its place

[doggedly]

[Meanwhile, out in the corridor....]

Hang on-- sorry!

[Urgent, and then apologetic, because Sirius has just stepped backwards, trod on Kate's foot, and has also thrown an arm out to stop any progress, which results in him sort of hitting her in the decolletage region (Remus' favourite). He doesn't drop that arm, but leaves it where it is, pressed to Kate, pressing her against the wall, just beside the door to the space bar. And there they wait, breathless, silent, like spies in a film.

Eventually, Sirius looks around at Kate, with a grin. He leaves his arm where it is.]

They're in there. [Which he delivers in a solemn undertone. Very spy.] But we've got to wait for just the right moment.

[fullmoon]

[ And they're all very grateful for the loss of Derek's superhuman hearing, just as they're grateful for the loss of his immunity to alcohol. Except Derek, maybe, but we've already established, what with all of the scheming and lying, that Derek's opinion about anything doesn't matter much at the moment.

What matters is scotch. While Sirius is whispering outside, Remus gives Derek's empty glass an impressed glance and reaches for the bottle to refill it. ]

I know. You came because you're a good bloke and I made you feel bad. [ He adds to what's left in his glass, too, for appearance's sake. ] You're probably a Hufflepuff.

[altercate]

[ what the hell is a hufflepuff? derek looks torn between offense and skepticism, unsure of whether or not he's being insulted. ]

A Hufflepuff. [ he echoes, conveniently ignoring the compliment couched in the first statement. ] Is that supposed to make me feel better about this?

[ as he redirects his skeptical expression to his glass. he didn't particularly want it refilled, and he has even less desire to down another cupful, so maybe the question is actually a way to stall. ]

[alsohawkeye]

[ Out in the hall, Kate stops short, both question and indignation cut off before they quite make it out of her mouth. She's pretty ok at stealth, lucky for Sirius, and also committed to this endeavor which he has presumably finished explaining to her before they arrived.

It doesn't mean she doesn't give him a long, flat look that's thoroughly unfooled and unimpressed by the 'coincidental' placement of his arm. Once they've stopped and are listening she gives it a shove, and reaches out to pinch his side hard. It comes with a twist of a smirk that says he's lucky they're friends enough that she's amused more than mad. ]

What is the right moment?

[doggedly]

Nghk--

[Which is not an answer, but is the kind of noise you make when you're trying to keep quiet and someone's pinched you in the side. Sirius tries to twist away, but both the placement of the wall and his efforts at stealth mean he just sort of flattens against the wall. Grinning, of course, because it's still funny.]

Stop harassing me and I'll be able to answer that. I'm trying to listen.

[Trying to listen for about three seconds more, and then, with a sigh, he grabs, blindly, for Kate's hand or wrist or arm.]

Oh, fuck it, let's go now.

[And he strides forward into the room, taking Kate with him if she's not twisted free. If she's not twisted free, he'll switch his grip to a loop of his arm, very strolling in the park on a Sunday afternoon.

Loudly, to Kate--without having (apparently) noticed either Remus or Derek "Lumpy Muscles" Hale--]

So tell me, Kate, just how many ex-boyfriends have you got? Have you shot any of them? Did they deserve it? Not that your archery is only good and useful after you've been scorned in love. Far from it. Just seems like that might be a natural reaction, given your skill. Which is great, by the way.

[fullmoon]

No, [ Remus is saying—no, it's not supposed to make Derek feel better, that's what the alcohol is for—when to everyone's complete and utter surprise, especially Remus', Sirius and Kate walk in. He could never have imagined such a strange coincidence. ]

Hullo, sorry, this one's occupied. [ He doesn't look at them until he's had another drink, then turns on his stool to smile. He doesn't pretend to mean it. Remus Lupin trying to make Sirius Black go away would probably be more suspicious than anything, and why would anyone at all ever try to run off Kate Bishop? ] I'm getting plastered and Derek is supervising. [ And also getting plastered. Drink up, Mr Hale. ] You might try next door.

[altercate]

[ derek looks from sirius and kate to remus, expression long-suffering. he isn't lifting his drink, maybe to drive the point home that he's supervising not participating, though he doesn't look particularly happy at the intrusion either. ]

Did you invite company?

[ or did sirius invite himself, is what goes unsaid here. ]

[doggedly]

There's loads of room.

[What a coincidence indeed! Sirius returns Remus' smile, perfectly surprised, before he gestures to the bar at large--which is quite massive and quite empty.]

And hiya to you, too, Derek. No, he didn't invite company, we were just passing by. Did you know they were going to be in here, Kate? [And before she can answer--] No, me neither. And yet here we are, and here you are. And there's loads of room. We'll just sit down over here.

[A cheerful wave, as he steps around toward one of the tables.]

C'mon, Kate. We don't want to interrupt plastered supervision. Only what's that you're drinking?

[He cranes his neck a little, hopefully, trying to see into Derek's glass.]