Anne Marie Cunningham (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
savethebullshit) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
ataraxionlogs2013-08-29 03:12 pm
savethebullshit) wrote in ataraxionlogs2013-08-29 03:12 pm
Entry tags:
[closed]
CHARACTERS: Anne Cunningham and Murphy Pendlebutt
LOCATION: the holodecks
WARNINGS: since Anne's always cursing, so probably that.
SUMMARY: Anne figures it's about time to propose.
NOTES:
After all this time, everything they've been through together and how long they've been in such a serious relationship, Anne probably shouldn't be this nervous.
But she is.
It's a no brainer, she tells herself. But then again, it's probably not. She's never proposed before. The only marriage she's been in started with her being startled when a proposal came out of nowhere in the middle of a drinking contest. With no experience on doing this sort of thing under her belt, it's understandable that her hands are shaking as much as they are, that she's pacing as much as she is. But she doesn't want to be this nervous. Anne isn't used to being nervous. She can look a monster in the face and not feel much more than a twinge of fear, she can head into a situation she knows she might not come out of armed with only her pistol and hold herself with calm resolve.
This, this right here, the impending proposal terrifies her. More than she could have imagined. It's an alien thing, to feel this nervous and shaken and still elated and excited more than Murphy will probably ever realize, even if she tries to tell him. This bizarre mix of emotions is one that makes it difficult to sit down, to hold still at all. All she can do is pace. This nervousness makes her entire body feel shaky. She's really not sure why.
Maybe it's because she wants this more than anything.
After all of the things they've faced together, all the good times and bad, being married to Murphy is something she wants more than she ever imagined she could want anything. She's sure it would sound silly and cheesy if she tried to convey it into words to him, but the feeling it gives her is enough to make her jittery in itself, jumping around in her stomach as she paces in a ten foot square pattern, kicking now and then at the not-real-but-still-so-real grass under her feet.
The holodeck is set up to show a sunny day, a field full of grass and flowers. Murphy's happy place. Since she found a photo that fell out of his things once so many months ago, she's known it was a special place to him, and now she figures it's as good a place as any to do this. Somehow, doing it in their own room wouldn't feel grand enough to her. Normally, in the past she hasn't been one for big romantic gestures. Somehow, Murphy has changed that. Maybe because she's driven so steadfastly by a desire to make him happy, she's taken to doing things that are silly. Ridiculous. The kinds of things you'd read about in a love advice section of a magazine and laugh.
Or she would have, years ago.
Now, she's grown up significantly. Partly because of life, and partly because of Murphy. All the more reason to want to share that life with the person who's given her so much already, this person that she loves so much that it probably contributes to the shaking of her hands, even now. Even after what's been nearly a year of being together. He still manages to make her feel like they're newlyweds, and they aren't even married. If today goes well, however, they will be soon. And that thought leads to another jittery smile and to her feeling even sillier pacing through the virtual grass and smiling like a crazy person.
Mind leaping from place to place, she continues to pace, waiting for him. In her pocket, the simple ring she found in the guard's quarters is reassuring whenever she puts her hand in to let her fingertip touch the smooth metal of the simple, plain trinket.
LOCATION: the holodecks
WARNINGS: since Anne's always cursing, so probably that.
SUMMARY: Anne figures it's about time to propose.
NOTES:
After all this time, everything they've been through together and how long they've been in such a serious relationship, Anne probably shouldn't be this nervous.
But she is.
It's a no brainer, she tells herself. But then again, it's probably not. She's never proposed before. The only marriage she's been in started with her being startled when a proposal came out of nowhere in the middle of a drinking contest. With no experience on doing this sort of thing under her belt, it's understandable that her hands are shaking as much as they are, that she's pacing as much as she is. But she doesn't want to be this nervous. Anne isn't used to being nervous. She can look a monster in the face and not feel much more than a twinge of fear, she can head into a situation she knows she might not come out of armed with only her pistol and hold herself with calm resolve.
This, this right here, the impending proposal terrifies her. More than she could have imagined. It's an alien thing, to feel this nervous and shaken and still elated and excited more than Murphy will probably ever realize, even if she tries to tell him. This bizarre mix of emotions is one that makes it difficult to sit down, to hold still at all. All she can do is pace. This nervousness makes her entire body feel shaky. She's really not sure why.
Maybe it's because she wants this more than anything.
After all of the things they've faced together, all the good times and bad, being married to Murphy is something she wants more than she ever imagined she could want anything. She's sure it would sound silly and cheesy if she tried to convey it into words to him, but the feeling it gives her is enough to make her jittery in itself, jumping around in her stomach as she paces in a ten foot square pattern, kicking now and then at the not-real-but-still-so-real grass under her feet.
The holodeck is set up to show a sunny day, a field full of grass and flowers. Murphy's happy place. Since she found a photo that fell out of his things once so many months ago, she's known it was a special place to him, and now she figures it's as good a place as any to do this. Somehow, doing it in their own room wouldn't feel grand enough to her. Normally, in the past she hasn't been one for big romantic gestures. Somehow, Murphy has changed that. Maybe because she's driven so steadfastly by a desire to make him happy, she's taken to doing things that are silly. Ridiculous. The kinds of things you'd read about in a love advice section of a magazine and laugh.
Or she would have, years ago.
Now, she's grown up significantly. Partly because of life, and partly because of Murphy. All the more reason to want to share that life with the person who's given her so much already, this person that she loves so much that it probably contributes to the shaking of her hands, even now. Even after what's been nearly a year of being together. He still manages to make her feel like they're newlyweds, and they aren't even married. If today goes well, however, they will be soon. And that thought leads to another jittery smile and to her feeling even sillier pacing through the virtual grass and smiling like a crazy person.
Mind leaping from place to place, she continues to pace, waiting for him. In her pocket, the simple ring she found in the guard's quarters is reassuring whenever she puts her hand in to let her fingertip touch the smooth metal of the simple, plain trinket.
no subject
They're nice and abundant and sometimes difficult to wake up from, accepting one reality for the other. These days it feels as though he really is living the lives of two different men -- the guy who flew to space, and the family man who spends his evenings after work teaching his son how to change tires. Either one doesn't bother him; he'll take what he can get.
Despite everything, he has a life here with Anne, with the Tranquility. He'll accept that as much as he accepts the cordial invitation text he'd received a few hours ago.
Not knowing what this was about, he figured that maybe this was just one of Anne's simple but nice gestures. She tries, and Murphy appreciates and loves her for that.
The long ass lift ride from the Oxygen Gardens to the holodecks made the not knowing all the more agonizing. It gave him time to think over the what-ifs of the situation. He knew that Anne had gone over to that place they docked at, and it didn't sound like things had gone as smoothly as he had hoped. But they were alive and he hoped she wasn't more hurt than she let on. Is that what this is about...? Was something wrong?
No. Murphy shakes his head as the lift comes to a halt, the doors opening up to the holodecks. This is something else, obviously. Anne wouldn't be asking to meet him here of all places, otherwise.
When he enters, a familiar scene opens up in vibrant colors that is much unlike the rest of the grays and blues of the ship. It's calming, like a dream.
His dream.
Only rather than Charlie, he sees Anne.
Words caught in his throat for the first several seconds, Murphy just lifts his hand in greeting as he approaches her. Then, he chokes out a "Hey" before swallowing.
It's all almost too nice for him.
no subject
"Murphy," she said by way of greeting, a wave of excitement and nervousness virtually punching her in the gut and threatening to take her down. But her smile remains in place and she walks over to meet him, pressing a kiss to his warm cheek when they come together. She almost thanks him for coming, but of course he came. Thanking him would feel odd and clunky and she's so nervous that even small things like this have her tripping on her words in her head.
Reaching out, she takes his hand gently, then stares out around them, at the tree that stands alone in the field at a slight distance from where they are. It seems like a good place, and she turns her eyes back to his face. "Don't look so worried," she says rather tenderly. "Why I asked you to come here... it isn't a bad thing. I promise." A small gesture toward the tree, an incline of her head. "Want to take a walk with me?"
no subject
It's nice here, though Murphy has seen it plenty of times in his sleep. With his son. Now he's here with Anne, leaving him with a feeling that is both new and nostalgic at the same time. He's speechless for a minute, only nodding at Anne's suggestion to walk.
His fingers furling over Anne's and giving it a squeeze, he goes ahead and guides her to the tree with slow and careful steps. Though he's not entirely sure what he's being so careful for.
"What's all this about?" Cutting to the chase, as usual. Murphy isn't one to dance around the bush for very long when he's got a nagging feeling that this is all leading to something more than a pleasant walk.
no subject
As the shade of the tree falls over them in a dappled pattern, a woven network of sun and shadow, Anne's breath catches in her throat when he asks. Sure, she was obviously going to get to it. But she didn't expect to have so little time to prepare. She expected to have time to procrastinate and internally agonize. But she realizes there's no point in procrastinating, in putting off this thing she's had at the back of her mind for months. "I wanted to ask you something..." she says unhelpfully, wetting her lips with her tongue. At this point she figures she can stop walking, and just take his hands and hold them, face him rather nervously.
And then, she realizes she doesn't want to put it off for moments to gain her composure. She doesn't want to wait for him to ask 'what is it?' and she doesn't want to waste another moment trying to grasp for precious seconds to gain some kind of magical power of all-encompassing calm and collectedness that she can usually find when she's at work. She's wasted so much time already, during those long months when she denied her feelings for him, and then for all that time she was afraid to make a move when she finally accepted them. This past year has been leading up to this, she knows, and there's no way she's going to let this moment slip because she's nervous.
"... I love you..." One of her hands lets go of his, and she reaches into the pocket of her jeans, fingertips catching the metal of the ring, warm from resting against her thigh. As she draws it out, she looks him in the eye, not exactly sure what to do with it yet as she swallows. Originally, she had so much to say, so many words she wanted to put into this, so many ways she wanted to tell him me matters to her. But those will have to wait for just a moment. Because like Murphy, when it's important she's one to cut right to the chase.
"Will you marry me." It doesn't come out sounding like a question, but that doesn't matter to her. Anne can recognize it as the most significant thing she's ever said to anyone and once it's out so is the wave of heavy nervousness, and it's replaced by excitement and relief and a swelling of affection and love for the man in front of her, feeling fulfilled knowing that after all this time, she finally said those words.
no subject
But he's not about to rush it, either. Jesus, no. There's something about unraveling a package too fast that steals away some of the anticipation, so Murphy isn't about to urge Anne to get on with it already. Because, shit... half of him almost expects her to come out with something else.
His mouth opens when she tells him that she loves him, and God help him, he could nearly hear the words I'm pregnant or something coming out before...
Well, before she says that.
Murphy's eyebrows lift as he just stares at her for a few seconds, then to the ring, and back to Anne again, long enough to know that she is being at her most sincere. It feels like the reels of some movie, with the scene and the lighting and everything that's factored in to this moment. Except that their film is far from over and he's just watching her for an even longer time with no words coming out of his goddamned mouth.
"I, uh... Shit. This isn't exactly how I imagined..." Murphy reaches behind his head with the hand that Anne had released earlier, his face hot and his ears flushed. Admittedly, if anyone had asked him if he ever thought about tying the knot while stuck on a ship that constantly tried to kill them, he'd have told them to stick that ring up their ass. But this was Anne Cunningham, Frank's daughter.
Truth was, he didn't know. He didn't know how he would have imagined this, if they would have been in some life-threatening situation and only then would Murphy had worked up the nerve to make some last minute vow just moments before knocking on Death's Door. Maybe that's why it's Anne with the ring here... Anne with the question. Because Murphy never...
"I mean, well, er. Yes." Managing a pathetic simper, Murphy laughed quietly. "Yeah, we should."
no subject
Though she's been married before, Anne has never been so sure she wanted to spend her life with someone as she is right now. Even though life here is chaotic and uncertain, she is certain about Murphy. He's worth it. She decided long ago that staying here and risking her life daily is well worth being able to be with him, and she's reminded of all this all over again as she meets his eyes. When he speaks, she manages a nervous laugh. She feels like a schoolgirl again.
"What's ever how we imagined it in space?" she asks, tilting her head slightly at him, nerves still seized up so tightly that she can't even breathe. Generally, Anne is not a woman taken to being nervous, but this is life here. This is a stab at permanence with the one person who's managed to make her feel human again after so many things she saw and did made her feel like a monster.
And then, it's all lifted when he laughs, when he says yes, in that usual ridiculous, bumbling away of his. She's fairly sure he's never been eloquent about anything a day in his life, and she wouldn't want it any other way. Her smile becomes more earnest at his response, and her hands are shaking more now, but not from nervousness. For a moment she nearly starts to cry, and instead she just smiles. She doesn't really say much of anything, just grabs his shoulders in her hands and pulls him forward to kiss with with what she's sure is probably more intensity than she's ever shown anyone in her life.
no subject
But maybe that's exactly all of what they don't need -- ties that remind them of that old and so much more logical life they had left behind, now that things were so chaotic and didn't make any damn sense. Nothing to remind him of a church with a priest and empty pews -- and just make it be the two of them, nervous and happy and in love.
Murphy could have that again, here with Anne. They could have it and make it their own.
"Well, shit. When you put that into perspective... guess weddings in space are whatever you want it to be. We could just jump over a broomstick and call it good." Murphy's face waned a little. "Er, sorry... that joke was probably in poor taste."
His humor wasn't exactly up to snuff when nervous himself. But with her hands on his shoulders and her lips pressed to his, he relaxes, and all that tension just ripples into soothing waves.