ataraxionlogs | [OPEN] don't you say it.

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[OPEN] don't you say it.

CHARACTERS: T STARK & YOU
LOCATION: In camp and surrounding area within radius.
WARNINGS: Nohomo sads
SUMMARY: Tony (and Digby) venture out in search of (1) missing Bucky Barnes.
NOTES: Catch him in camp or after he's already out

[ tony searches the treehouse he had made with bucky first, naturally, though he doesn't expect to find him. next is the campground and the med tent, though those also come up empty. he's trying not to panic, it isn't exactly unheart of for the man to go m.i.a. or to go long stretches without checking in. but tony thinks he earned at least a brief text or something in notification. especially after he'd fixed his arm; he thought they were really getting somewhere. so of course this place would deam now to be the time to take the soldier back.

another thing that disturbs him: if bucky really did go back 'home,' did he have anywhere to go? anyone to care what happened to him? tony seems even more listless than usual as he heads away from their settlement and out into the wilderness. he's carrying a handmade lantern and his gun is carefully tucked into his jacket in case he encounters more of those terrible creatures. but he wouldn't be opposed to company either. ]

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[These pauses sure are long and awkward. Rikku can't remember the last time she experienced so many and handled them... so well. Slowly maturing with time. And crazy space adventures. An undesirable cocktail of shit to be sure, but so far it seems to kind of be working out for her.

Her smile is sincere, and she takes one hand from her pocket to wiggle her pinky at him in a mock of a pinky-swear] No take-backsies, promise. I'm not that kind of girl. [That is surprisingly close to the Tony Stark she remembers, and it gives her hope. Not that this Tony will be the same, but that they can be friends.]

[ tony doesn't even notice any awkwardness, but he's beyond distracted. he does catch the pinky thing and it gets the shadow of a smile out of him. ]

I'll hold you to that, Rikku. [ at least he was listening for her name? ] How long were you on the ship?

[And hearing him say her name brings up more than one emotion she doesn't want to think about right now. Once Cid had basically failed as a mentor to her, finding Tony Stark in the City had been like a new beginning. She'd been given the chance to start over with a new mentor who actually listened to her, and when he ran off to do crazy things, at least he came back.

His question catches her off guard, and she actually has to do some calculations in her head. Time was funny on the ship, after all.] Uh, about two years, I think. I mean, assuming the jumps happened once a month.

[ he gets a wave of something just then, for no reason. that's been happening a lot. he frowns, wondering if that has anything to do with another trend he's noticed. ] ...Were you somewhere else before that? Somewhere... not home?

[The question catches her off guard for just a moment. She knows that there are a couple people who had made a pit stop in another dimension on their way to the ship--Ned had been one of them. She nods, looking up towards the sky.] It was called the City. In a state called New York on a planet called Earth. It was... well, it became my home. I had a job, a boyfriend, the works. Losing it when I was dragged here sucked. Hard.

I'm from New York City. [ but something about the way she says it, he doesn't think it's the same one. he can't be sure why that's the impression he's left with however. ] My friend... the guy we're looking for. He was somewhere else first, too.

[New York City was a name she'd heard tossed around, and she's always been sure that the City was its replacement in whatever dimension that world was in. She glances over at him, tilting her head with interest.] Do you know where?

No. Somewhere... steampunky. He was never a big talker. [ tony shrugs a shoulder. ] I know, none of this is actually relevant. [ he's just out of ideas. ]

Steampunky? [She's heard the phrase before, but hasn't ever met anyone from an entire world like that.] Sounds cool. I guess the dimension I was stuck in was a little ahead of the curve on tech from the uh, "standard" Earth. It was way ahead of my home, though. [Relevancy is overrated.]

[ he nods, breathing out a little sigh. he's gotten used to only speaking when it's necessary being around people from home. people who hated him. rikku seems to be encouraging him to talk about nothing and that's comforting in its own way. ]

Ahead, how? It was kind of cool, they gave him this metal-- arm. [ oops he wasn't supposed to tell her that. it probably can't do much harm unless he comes back though. ] I fixed it for him. It was this weird mixture of old and new tech.

[A metal arm. She thinks she remembers someone from back in the City with one of those, but she's almost certain it isn't the same person Tony is talking about.] For one thing, the prosthetics. [Keeping on this subject is something she enjoys.] I have a friend back home who was missing an arm and a leg. The prosthetics we were able to rig up for him were top of the line, and he still couldn't walk without a cane and a limp. But in the City... man, I once met a guy, and I couldn't even tell he had a prosthetic until he peeled back the covering and showed me. It blew my mind! He could move each finger. It was incredible.

[ tony's smile turns wan. ] They can do all that with 3D printing now, you know. It takes some of the art out of it, maybe, but it's going to make it a lot more affordable in the developing world. [ which is a passion of his, and pepper's, and si. in recent years even more so. ]

I miss my version, too. [ new york. the people in it. ]

[3D printing. Rikku can hardly imagine it. She's certain that something like it existed in the City, but she isn't sure if it was available in the way he's talking about. She can't help but smile.] You know, I used to think that dimension-hopping was the worst thing that happened to me. But I've met lots of people, and learned lots of things I never could have on Spira. That's worth something, you know? It's important. And if I ever get to go back, I gotta believe that I'll remember everything I've learned so I can put it to use. [Because otherwise... what's the point of it all been?]

I think I know what you mean. [ he hesitates over whether to say more, but... he hasn't been able to speak to anyone freely since coming here. sometimes you just have to have faith, and he's better at trusting people than they are at trusting him it would seem. (and he's not that good at it anymore.) ]

The man who went missing, he wasn't my friend. And my only friend here... she isn't either. Back... home, I mean. She hates me actually. Most people do now.

[Rikku's brow furrows, as she tries to process that. She can't imagine any of her friends hating her. She can't imagine why his friends would hate him.] But you're still looking for him. That counts for something. [What that is, she doesn't know.]

[ he's embarrassed honestly, unsure after the fact what had made him open up like that. he ends up just nodding, though he's even jumpier than usual. every minute jungle sound has him turning and trying to identify it, craning his neck to study the branches of the trees. ]

...Yeah. [ he says, belatedly, realizing he's gone quiet again. something rikku knows is not any tony stark's m.o. ] I helped him look for Cap when I first got here. I owe him.

[ there's something about that that's off, but he just keeps walking. ]

[Honestly, Rikku doesn't mind. She's always been pretty open about herself, and that hadn't change since leaving Spira. And whenever people open up to her, there's nothing that will keep her from listening. Sure, she's a little more toned-down personality wise, but that's more because she's mellowed than because she doesn't care.

But again, something is different about this Tony. His intermittent pockets of silence speak to that. She can't put her finger on it and, honestly, she isn't sure she wants to. It's hard to watch someone you look up to change.]

What do you mean, you owe him? If you don't mind me asking.

[ what does he mean? he works his jaw, mulling that over. bucky had helped him out a lot, though tony had tried to do the same in return. ]

I just... do. Sorry if that's lame, or whatever. [ he just feels that way, and can't exactly finger why. ] As much as I don't want anyone I like to get stuck here... it was nice. [ to get to know him a little. ]

[She shrugs, a smile easily finding its way to her lips.] It isn't lame if you believe it. [Rikku looks away a bit, off into the distance. That is a sentiment she can definitely, definitely relate to.] Yeah... it sucks being alone. But the guilt from feeling happy about having a friend with you sucks even more. It's a no-win situation, no matter what dimension you're in. [Trust her, she knows a thing or two about guilt.]

I'm used to being alone. [ he could be comfortable with that, even if he did hate it. he won't admit that, not even to someone who feels the same way. ] Guilt, too.

[ there was no second he was alive that it didn't attempt to crush him in one way or another. tony looks around again, growing weary of this search though they can't have left long ago. that's the problem with doing something from your heart rather than a logical place. he knows there's no way bucky is out here and yet-- ]

Do you think they go back? The people who disappear. [ obviously as she had come from another universe, the possibilities were endless. but he likes to think bucky is happy, or the man's version of it, wherever it is he ended up. again, not at all rational but it gives him a small degree of comfort all the same. ]

[It... hurts her to hear him say that. She doesn't want him to feel alone, or guilty. But it seems as if that's all anyone here feels anymore. And Rikku hates that. At least in the City, people could flourish. Here, they're all just dying slowly from boredom and humidity.

But she can at least be optimistic about this.] I like to think so. People always said that about the City--that when people left, they went back home. I guess there's an exception to every rule [She gestures to herself.] but that doesn't make it the rule.

[ somehow, it's a comfort. he nods once, hoping wherever bucky is that he's safe. if there is such a place for him anymore. ]

While we're out here... you want to show me that lizard trick?

[A small grin flicks across her lips, and then she resumes intertwining her fingers behind her head, the picture of nonchalance.] Sure. You ever made a snare before?

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[OPEN] don't you say it.

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